I'm a little confused about gift-giving, here. You say that your mom gave her biological grandchildren a 'gift' of about $ value before your wife and her daughter came over. Was it a joint gift that the two of them had to share? Was it a gift that the family could presumably share? (., a game system, etc?) Or was it two $50 gifts to each of them? I'm sorry your step-daughter's feelings were hurt. But on the other hand, it's hard for me to feel too badly for her, since she still raked in over $ in Christmas loot from someone who is, basiy, no relation to her. And I have to wonder WHY her feelings are hurt what were her expectations? Were her feelings hurt before or after her mother noticed the discrepancy? You can't "fix" this problem. You can't re-do Christmas, and giving her a $ gift for "equity" would send a fairly poor message on the meaning of Christmas, IMHO. What does your wife WANT you to do? If she's standing her ground on equity in presents then she needs to look to her own family, first, before she starts pointing fingers, and get some perspective on this. And, moving forward, you're going to have to make it clear to your mom that you are a package deal, now.
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