Just like when we do something, in our minds, nice for someone; we have a preconceive notion that they should react in a certain way or behavior. When they don't, we feel resentment or dejection generally speaking. Well in most households, housework is really not held in high regard. It be appreciated when it is something new to a person but change in time to become an expectation. Once it is an expectation it is no longer appreciated. The appreciation come about if the spouse discovers this behavior is not the norm when conversing with others. In general we through societal influences form certain expectations. Most men believe, taught indirectly by society, they are being generous when they do housework. The women believe, as they should, that they are equals so their perception is that it is an expectation. Did you appreciate her doing housework or did you view it as an expectation? For your efforts you were expecting appreciation weren't you? That is what she expected in return. We all like to feel appreciated and that must take a form that we understand. She did not understand that your doing housework was your form of saying how you appreciated her. Is it her fault that her value system is different than yours and yours from her? Sorry to say but he left for reasons not known to us. What those reasons are we don't know, whether they were valid or not. Only she and maybe you know the truth.
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